Drinking humor

Macland Nov 14, 2011

  1. Macland

    Macland Titan Swapped / SAS'd Founding Member

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    There's a saying that a stories don't usually start with we were eating a salad. So post up the stories or pics that start with we were just having a few drinks:
     
    drbandkgb likes this.
  2. Macland

    Macland Titan Swapped / SAS'd Founding Member

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  3. Hugetanker

    Hugetanker <img src="http://i164.photobucket.com/albums/u7/ra Founding Member

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    Ahhh man, I want to participate in this...but I like being a member here sooooo......
     
  4. Macland

    Macland Titan Swapped / SAS'd Founding Member

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    Haha, well post the pg-13 stories and keep the rated R ones for your future Hangover movie ;)
     
  5. Macland

    Macland Titan Swapped / SAS'd Founding Member

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  6. Macland

    Macland Titan Swapped / SAS'd Founding Member

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  7. Macland

    Macland Titan Swapped / SAS'd Founding Member

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    [​IMG]

    My word was cinder blocks.....ssssssssiiiiiiiinnnndner blnocks
     
  8. RATTFINK

    RATTFINK XN OG Admin. Founding Member

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    [video=youtube_share;KgWGHWNXC1E]http://youtu.be/KgWGHWNXC1E[/video]






    well, as i came home on Monday night
    as drunk as drunk could be
    I sar a harse outside the door
    where my old harse should be
    so i called the whife and i said to her, "Will you kindly tell to me, who owns that harse outside the dar where moy old harse should be?"
    "aaah ya drunk ya drunk you silly old fool, i tell you cannot see thats a lovely Sow that me mother sent to me"
    "where many a days I travel, a hundered miles or more, but a sow with a saddle on, i never saw before"
    Now, as I came home on Tuesday night
    as drunk as drunk could be
    i sar a coat behind the dar where moy old coat should be
    so i called the whife and said to her, "WIll you kindly tell to me, who owns that coat behind the dar, where moy old coat should be?"
    "aaah, ya drunk ya drunk ya silly old fool, i tell you cannot see, thats a lovely blanket that me mother sent to me"
    "well many's the day i travel, a hundred mile or more, but buttons on a blanket sure I never seen before"
    And as i went home on wednesday night
    as drunk as drunk could be
    I sar a pipe upon the chair where moy old pipe should be
    I called the whife and i said to her, "will you kindly tell to me, who owns that pipe upon the chair, where my old pipe should be?"
    "aaah ya drunk ya drunk, ya silly old fool, still ya cannot see, thats a lovely tin whistle that me mother sent to me."
    "well a manys the day i travel, a hundered miles or more, but tobacco in a tin whistle sure i never seen before"
    AAnd as I, went home on Thursday night
    As drunk as drunk could be
    I sar two boots beneath the bed
    Where my two boots should be
    so i called the Whife
    and i said to her, " will you kindly tell to me, who owns those boots beneath the bed, where moy old boots should be?"
    "aaaah! ya drunk ya drunk you silly old fool, tell ya cannot see, thats a lovely geranuim pot me mother sent to me"
    "well as manys the day i travel , a hundred miles or more, but laces on a geranuim pot, i never seen before"
    And a- I went home on friday night
    as drunk as dllunk could be
    I saw a head
    upon the bed
    where my own head should be
    so i called the whife and i said to har,"will you kindly tell to me, who owns, that head, upon the bed, where my old head should be"
    "AHHH! ya drunk ya durnk ya silly old fool, tell ya cannot see, thats a baby boy that me mother sent to me"
    "Well it's manys a day i travel, a hundred miles or more, But a baby boy with whiskers, THAT i never seen before"

    "oh a drunk ya drunk ya silly old fool, YA DRUNK! Your a silly old fool! your drunk! Your drunk!! Ya silly old fool, your drunk! your drunk!!"
     
  9. civicjoe

    civicjoe lone wolf mod Super Moderator Founding Member

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    went to a party last weekend this was a huge hit idea, however no one willing to do it.
     
  10. Macland

    Macland Titan Swapped / SAS'd Founding Member

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    Bummer, looks like a fun night.
     
  11. Macland

    Macland Titan Swapped / SAS'd Founding Member

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    A tribute to Taken
    [​IMG]
     
  12. AbuseTheElderly

    AbuseTheElderly <img src="http://i164.photobucket.com/albums/u7/ra Founding Member

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    Lots of winning here. Hilarious.
     
  13. Hugetanker

    Hugetanker <img src="http://i164.photobucket.com/albums/u7/ra Founding Member

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    Haha, nice!
     
  14. Macland

    Macland Titan Swapped / SAS'd Founding Member

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    saw this on fmylife.com

    Today, some friends and I were pulled over on our way back from a party. We'd had a few drinks, so we tried to play it cool just in case we were over the limit. The cop didn't seem to want to breathalyze us, until my really high friend in the back seat said, "These are not the droids you are looking for." FML

    [​IMG]
     
  15. Macland

    Macland Titan Swapped / SAS'd Founding Member

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  16. Macland

    Macland Titan Swapped / SAS'd Founding Member

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  17. Krisnherx

    Krisnherx Skid Plates Founding Member

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    Bump for some new humor. These are all pretty funny.
     
  18. Krisnherx

    Krisnherx Skid Plates Founding Member

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    Drinking Wisdom
    "The hard part about being a bartender is figuring out who is drunk and who is just stupid."

    "When I read about the evils of drinking, I gave up . . . reading." Henny Youngman

    "In the Bowling Alley of Tomorrow, there will even be machines that wear rental shoes and throw the ball for you. Your sole function will be to drink beer." Dave Barry

    "Actually, it only takes one drink to get me loaded. Trouble is, I can't remember if it's the thirteenth or fourteenth." George Burns

    "Do not allow children to mix drinks. It is unseemly and they use too much vermouth." Steve Allen

    "An intelligent man is sometimes forced to be drunk to spend time with fools." Ernest Hemmingway

    "If your doctor warns that you have to watch your drinking, find a bar with a mirror." John Mooney

    "I can't die until the government finds a safe place to bury my liver." Phil Harris

    "Everybody should believe in something -- I believe I'll have another drink." Unknown

    "Whenever someone asks me if I want water with my Scotch, I say, "I'm thirsty, not dirty". Joe Lewis

    "I told the stewardess liquor for three." - "Who are the other two? - "Oh, there are no other two."
    James Bond
     
  19. Krisnherx

    Krisnherx Skid Plates Founding Member

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  20. Xterrafauss

    Xterrafauss Suspension Lift

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    Thought this belonged here.....
    [​IMG]
     
  21. Macland

    Macland Titan Swapped / SAS'd Founding Member

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    Actually it goes here ;)
     
  22. Xterrafauss

    Xterrafauss Suspension Lift

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    Copy that el capitan!

    Thanks for the move :)
     
  23. Macland

    Macland Titan Swapped / SAS'd Founding Member

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    Red wine and blue toothpaste make purple spit. Ask me how I know.
     
  24. Cruecible

    Cruecible Titan Swapped / SAS'd

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    [​IMG]

    Seriously though, how'd it taste
     
  25. xnjxterra

    xnjxterra Loud and obnoxious

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    my mom was watching my kid and brushed his teeth with hand lotion. i wish i could say she was drunk, but she's just Polish.
     
  26. obi_krash

    obi_krash Suspension Lift

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    Surprised there are not more CAH posts here.
    Unless there are and the pics Mac posted that I cannot see are those.
     
  27. Macland

    Macland Titan Swapped / SAS'd Founding Member

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    No I think this thread was just buried and forgotten for so long.
     
  28. obi_krash

    obi_krash Suspension Lift

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    We have a bunch of the expansion packs and will be playing with friends tomorrow.

    I will make sure to post pics.
     
  29. xnjxterra

    xnjxterra Loud and obnoxious

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    that game is ridiculously funny. never laughed so hard!
     
  30. Prime

    Prime Some Kind of In Charge? Admin

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    I love it. I always forget to take pictures of the good ones.

    /or is it the bad ones
    //can never remember
     
  31. JeffPro4x

    JeffPro4x Hot Pipe Moderator Supporting Member

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    Huge fan of CAH. I signed up for their "10 days or whatever of kwanza" this year and got some cool stuff from them. Including personalized cards and 1sq ft of property on their private island in Maine.

    [​IMG]
     
    Last edited: Jan 17, 2015

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